Sunday, 5 August 2012

When you hate what you see

Every girl has, at least once, in her life hated what she sees in the mirror.
In my experience, it can be because of low selfesteem, bullying and even because of your significant other.

I wouldn't say that my selfesteem is low, or has ever been, but of course I've doubted myself and what I look like just like everybody else.
So I didn't really know how to handle it when I was with someone who made me so unbelievable uncomfortable with myself.
It wasn't anything he did, just the way he made me feel.
Made me feel terrible, like I wasn't good enough, pretty enough, smart enough.

For some reason, I always get insecure when I'm in a relationship with a guy.
I start putting myself down, worry about my weight and how I look.
I'm completely clueless to why it's like this, but I know that it will probably haunt me until I die.

I don't wish it on anyone, but a part of me hopes that I'm not the only one with this ''problem''.
 If you can relate, please let me know so I can feel less like a freak.
(Really needed to get this of my chest, by the way)

But anyways...

Ever since I ended the relationship, I've slowly gone back to my old self, but those annoying feelings are still there.
I just need more time, I guess.
Been trying my hardest to focus on work and my possible moving plans, which is much needed.
New town and new people sounds so amazing.
All I need is to find a job and hopefully the rest will fall into place.

But speaking of falling...
I'm heading to bed before I pass out..
Been having this horrible headache all day and it's pretty obvious that my mind needs a break.
Oh the joys of overthinking things..

Hope you'll have an awesome week :)


- Melissa

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